love me like you're scared

there is a relationship between fear and love and that is nothing new.
perform your care : push an apology down a hill.
the gravity will eventually build and kill.
so tremble sweetly on high : you’ve been absolved of committing harm 
because once you said Black Lives Matter loud enough to be seen. 
i love to tell you that
i love you : even when 
i mean it so much that i can’t.

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there is a spark stretched so thin that it extends between fear and love and
that is a secret hidden nowhere. you can see it. tell me you’re the last one 
to love me : cry until you think you hurt too. the anger will ultimately swallow 
and churn to bitterness in your core. structure the support so it fits to the shape of your resentment. i love you too : just not like that.

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there is a scar that the fear left when it scraped the depths of the love 
you forced into your heart : you took it down like a barbed pill, the pain
felt like oppression : for one second : your empathy is the scared child you never
learned how to reparent : hurt people hurt people : but i’m still young and still
resting for my ancestors : surviving now : my whole life was cramped in a violent grip : 
so i reacted : expanded with so much thrust that the whiplash stunned : you saw an explosion :
i crashed against the collective obligation to be still and stagnant in a misaligned politic : 
the social expectation that most people only die once : i was never allowed to live like that.
i loved you too : just not like that.